What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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