you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Pants are for mortals
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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