My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
