Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Randomize
