If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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