from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
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His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
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Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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