mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
barbara walters just said penis...
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
In other news, I just burned my penis
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
