My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
