i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
