I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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