is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
