remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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