Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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