Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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