Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
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No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
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Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
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