I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
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I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
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I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.