ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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