Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
