Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
