what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
