I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Randomize