1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Randomize
