He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize
