I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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