I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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