I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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