He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize
