you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
