So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
