I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Randomize
