hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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