do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Randomize