Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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