So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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