every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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