Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize
