ya dads aren't the best wingmen
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Watching her eat just hurts me
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Randomize
