I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.