i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
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