He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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