So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Randomize
