He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
