I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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