Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Randomize
