whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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