We won't sleep together?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
