So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
Randomize