Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
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