Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
