Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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