what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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