What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
